I AM Still Alive.

So I know it has literally been forever since I have posted. I recently moved up to NAU at the end of August, and that has been such an adjustment, for the better I must say. I LOVE it here. I never want to go home, because this has become my home. It is so beautiful up here. There are trees everywhere, almost like living in a forest.

When we first got here, I'm not gonna lie, I broke down. I was so scared because our dorm is at the top of this really big hill that we have to walk up to get inside. So the first week was insane, I was in so much pain. I was so sick all the time, and it began to worry me. I was scared that I wouldn't be able to handle living here. The miraculous thing is that I am doing so much better now. I definitely get sick frequently still, don't get me wrong. But I feel healthier because I am forced to walk everywhere, and it does calm the Fibromyalgia down a bit. So as my body adjusted to being in such a new environment, I began to love it here more and more.

So let me just walk through with everyone what I have been up to since I moved here.

The first week was alright. On like our second day here before classes started, we were eating dinner at the University Union, and this girl, Marina came up to us and asked us if she could eat with us. Ever since then, we have been meeting people left and right. Marina is so outgoing. So we pretty much know most of the people living in our hall and in our wing. One of the girls, Michelle comes to chill with us in our dorm all the time. We love her. :) Anyway, on the very first day of classes, I had my Bio 181 class from 8-8:50 and my lab from 10:30-1. The Bio class was alright, but I did NOT like my lab. My partner was super shy and reserved. And the two people sitting across from us had such an attitude. At one point, they were talking about how we had classes off for Labor Day. I wanted to feel like apart of their group, so to make conversation, I told them that my birthday was on Labor Day so it's nice to have the day off. They literally said NOTHING to me. They just looked at me awkwardly. I'm not gonna lie, I went home that night and cried. I felt so unaccepted like I was never going to make any friends. But then it got a lot better.

As the weeks went on, I started to realize that it didn't matter if I had friends in my classes or not. I had made many friends in my dorm, and I needed to focus on learning in my classes, not making more friends. So that's what I did. I hang out with the people in my dorm, and I focus on paying attention in class.

For my birthday, my roommate, Amie surprised me! We got up and took a shower and when we came back, the whole floor of girls was in our room with a cake and balloons and confetti! It was the sweetest thing ever. For the rest of the day, we sort of relaxed, because I was sick. That brings me to another point...

Ever since I was little, I have always gotten sick frequently. When I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, everything sort of came together. People with Fibro often do get really sick frequently, because I guess Fibro interferes with their immune system or something. I don't know. But the point is that I have gotten sick like three times since I've been here. The first time, I went to Urgent Care because I had a staff infection on my nose and I had been having stomach pains. They referred me to the ER where they literally did nothing but give me a shot for my Fibro pain(which I wasn't even there for) and tell me that I was probably fine and they didn't want to take any scans of my stomach. Well, I ended up following up with the doctor on campus for my stomach problems, and he decided not to do anything either. He said, "It's probably IBS" and sent me on my way. While it could be IBS, I was having much more severe symptoms and cramps and fevers and a bunch of other stuff so it made no sense to me that the doctor didn't care. Shortly after that, I got the flu. So I was back to the doctor on campus. This time I saw a lady who told me that if my stomach issues persist, I should really come back. Finally someone takes interest in my problems and doesn't just blow me off! So as the cramping in my lower abdomen got worse, I made another appointment with the doctor to see what other options there were. The day before this scheduled appointment, something else happened! For about a week before this, I would lay down for a while and get up and feel a tingling sensation on the right side of my foot on the bottom...it was driving me crazy but I didn't think it was serious enough to go to the doctor. However, after I was walking around and realized that my foot had turned blue, I decided to go to Urgent Care. Ughh. When I got there, I saw the same idiot that ignored my stomach issues, and you know what he told me??? He said, wear better shoes. I just spent a $40 copay to be told to wear better shoes! And wearing sandles is going to turn my foot BLUE? I don't thinks so. But whatever. The next day I went in for my appointment about my stomach. This doctor was very nice. She listened to me and asked lots of questions. She decided to put me on birth control to see if it would help with my symptoms.

I know that was a crazy ramble about medical nonsense, but I do have a point. My point is one: the medical care at the NAU campus is crappy...really crappy. And two: I just hate being sick all the time. Ever since Fibro, my medical problems have added up. I end up feeling scared to go the doctor because I'm not sure if they'll think I'm making it up since I go see them all the time. It's a terrible feeling. That's really the hardest thing I've had to deal with since moving here. I have to get used to the fact that I'm going to be going to doctors frequently probably for the rest of my life. I just need to find the right ones that will listen to me and believe that I really am having a problem...not that I am a hypochondriac.

Anyway, aside from the medical issues, I LOVE college. I can be completely myself and I can live however I need to for ME. Some of my classes are challenging, but I still love them. Also, a week ago, I got my first tattoo! Here is the picture. The top one is of the finished tattoo. The bottom is of the outline before he put it on. It did hurt ridiculously. But it was worth it. I LOVE it so much...soooooo muuuch!

I think that did a good job of updating anyone who reads this on what I have been up to. I will try to post as frequently as I can. :)

I am thankful for friends and doctors who care about you and know what they're doing. (:

God bless everyone.